How It All Started - Part I

This is how it all started... And since then, it's been a rollercoaster ride, one crazy thing after another. And you barely have time to just take a moment to breathe. I remember two courses ago, while saying hi to Sn. a friend of mine at Gust, he was walking around with another couple of guys. One, I've met earlier, the first day of that course, so I smiled from far away. The second though, I haven't seen at uni before, he seemed old enough to be there probably the same time I got into Gust, maybe even before. The first thing I noticed about this person is his confidence when he walks, I've always admired that in men, it shows so much when it comes to reading their charecters. He had no smile on his face, some people are just like that naturally, walking with a straight face; he was standing far away from Sn., maybe respecting the fact that he doesnt know me and so kept his distance until Sn. and I were done having our daily goofey conversations.

I was sitting at one of the tables in the West Wing with a friend of mine when Sn. approached me, and just before he left, I called out and when he got closer, I asked who his friend was. He then had a smile on his face mischivously knowing that I'm obviously interested, but I tried playing cool and didnt gove much attention to it. And so, the rest of the semester passed by without seeing much of that person, rarely maybe - between classes. Last course, things changed... Dramatically. How so? Everytime I saw Sn. and we'd say hello and talk, that person would be there, everytime I left one of my classes and wanted to go to our usuall spot where my friends and I sit, I'd find him around, sitting a couple of tables away from us. I regarded the fact that now I'd see him more often, even at odd places, like the North Wing where girls usually have their classes. And slowly, I started having some interest, I'm not going to lie. He's amazingly attractive, and just like I said earlier, he had this confidence when he walks. I started noticing him looking min 6araf 3aina, but I try not to be as obvious, and sooner than later, he started passing by our table walking with his friend and looking straight at me, so directly that I felt insecure.

When it all started, I didnt think much of it, so some guy was staring, what was I supposed to do? Stare back and yell at hime? No, I'd stay quiet... And little did I know that this person would be a part of my life... After a few weeks of making eye contact for half a second, I'd sort of ''hide'' until he's gone, I'd walk into random places like one of the bathrooms or the hallways until he passes by. My friends would laugh at me thinking that it's cute, but inside, I'd have my heart beating so hard I could hear it. Sn. would call me whenever he felt like talking and delibaretely brings him up just to see how I'd react, he knew that I was ineterested even though I didn't actually say anything to him, nevermind anyone else. Some time during the middle of the semester, I got a call from a close friend of mine, Mz. ''Did you know we talked to him today at Gust when you left?''. I knew straight away who she was talking about. Him. I was so nervous, she told me everything, at first, it was so overwealming and I was in total shock. The nerve.

Apparently Mz and another friend were sitting at one of the tables after finishing from one of their evening classes, and he walked in through one the the gates, I'm guessing North, since he usually parks there. So they started talking, I don't know who approached who first, frankly I don't care, I just care about what they had to say to eachother. Mz was extremely straight forward, she asked him-point blank- whether or not he was interested in me, he tried playing dumb and asked who she was talking about. ''The girl with the purple shirt, N.'' ''Yes, I think it's pretty obvious that I do but it shows clearly that she's not even remotely interested in me.'' They both asked him how he was able to figure that out. ''Sn. calls her infront of me sometimes and has her on speaker without her knowing about it, she says it out loud... She doesnt like me. That's the only proff I need, it came out of her lips.'' So Mz called me that night and told me all about it. I was very surprised, from many things.

First, how could they have the balls to talk to him about it? I mean, it's just a little bit too extreme, don't you think? He probably thought that I sort of made them ask him 3alabuna ana madree shisalfa, I didnt want it to seem that way, I didn't want him to think I'm that desperate. Second of all, how could Sn.- the person I trust, and the person whom I considered a brother, could have me on speaker around his friend and ask me awkward questions about him. I barely reacted to what she's said, asking for more details but not showing any emotions, figures... Guys are asswipes and that's that. I forgot about him. But Sn., I just needed to make sure that what I've heard is completely true, I saw him the next day and when he smiled, I didn't smile back. Just continued walking, I felt bad but I had to be certain he wasn't being a jerk. On my way home from Gust that day, I sent Sn. a text asking if what Mz said was true, he denied all of it, saying it's bullshit and shame on me for trusting that sort of information, it was obviously he was disapointed in me but how could he blame me? One friend said something, and another said something completely different. Bitch. I'd deal with her when I see her.

I trusted Sn. and I've known him for so long, Mz on the other hand, even though I've been friends with her for a while, we had some past issues, mostly related to guys she knew. It pissed me off, but we just forget about it and move on pretending that everything's okay. I asked Sn. to stay quiet about this whole issue, no one had to know about what we've talked about, he agreed.

Yeah? No.

Two days later, while I was having a nap after school, I got a weird number calling me. I decided to call back when I woke up, now was not the time. Malee 5ilg I deal with some phone call prank from some kid who had nothing better to do. But no, a minute later, that person calls again. I picked up mnafsa, it was pretty obvious my mood was crappy. I hate it when someone wakes me up like this, wei3? Wei3. ''Nam3am.'' ''Aloo, salam 3aleikum, N.?'' ''Hala, ee na3am, minu ma3ay? Shbi3éit?'' Islooby kaan 7ada (N) but can you blame me? ''Hi, mm... I'm kk (let's call him kk)''. Right then, I realised who was calling me, it was him. Him. HE was calling me, alot of emotions and thoughts were going through my head, why is he calling me? How did he get my number? Some balls, specially after what happened, I didnt know the whole truth so for now, I didnt wanna deal with anything.

I pretended like I didn't know him, so I asked ''Minu kk? A3arfik?'' ''Ee, cham kk t3arfeen?'' Moo wagta he jokes around, so I was like ''What's up? How did you get my number?'' He knew I wanted to get this over with so he was done with small talk. ''I got your number from Sn., bas la t3a9been 3aleih, I practically forced him, he told me about what Mz told you, that I went up to her and said what I said. So I called to tell you the honest truth, and by the end of this conversation, you can believe her or me, shay raji3lich.'' Wow. This problem was blown way out of proportion, more drama, I didn't want that. I just didn't need it.

To be continued...

P.S, more shit happened today with those two friends I wrote about, the ones who fought at uni? Yeah, apparently one of them, not Mz, started talking poop about XTC and I, maala da3ee? Yeah, thanks, 7ada! But I laughed and brushed it off, whatever... Bitch (:

N. Kk
xx